BriffaWay – Mrs May at the Hotel California

Has anyone else noticed that the B.. word has not been mentioned much in the press in the last few days. Is this a good sign or bad? Is nothing at all happening or is Mrs May in secret talks. To fill the gap here’s a parody of the song Hotel California for all you Eagles fans out there.

On a grim Brussels Highway, cool wind in her hair
Warm smell of waffles, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, she saw a shimmering light
He head grew heavy and her sight grew dim
She had to stop for the night

There he stood in the doorway
She heard the mission bell
And she was thinking to myself this could be heaven or this could be Hell
Then he offered her his opinion, said he would show her the way
There were voices down the corridor
Thought she heard them say

Welcome to the EU Commission
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face
Plenty to do at the EU Commission
Any time of year (any time of year) you might find someone here

His mind was well and truly twisted
Kept on about his Mercedes Benz
Also that there were a lot of lovely national leaders that he called friends
How they danced in the Commission courtyard, sweet summer sweat
Some danced to remember, some danced to forget

So she called up Jean-Claude Juncker
Please bring me some wine
He said ‘we haven’t had the budget for that since 1999′
And still those voices were calling from far away
Woke her up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say

Welcome to the EC Commission such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely place
They livin’ up at the EC Commission
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise) bring your alibis

Painted flags on the ceiling
Pink champagne at a price
And she said ‘we are all prisoners here, of our own device’
And in the member’s chamber
They gathered for a feast
They stab peeled grapes with their steel knives
But they can’t kill the beast

Last thing she remembers
She was running for the door
She had to find the passage back to the place she was before
Relax said night watchman Barnier
We are programmed to receive
You can check out any time you like
But you can never leave

Welcome to the …..

Written by Margaret Briffa